Defeat

Well my story it’s all about a defeat of love. It began when I met a guy that was going to change my life and make me feel things I have never felt. Until this guy came into my life I really hadn’t find someone that I love as much as I loved him, that I miss as much as him or even cry as much as I cry for him. He was really at first the perfect guy, but for some of my friends he was just not the right guy for me, but when you are in love you just don’t take advices and I believe you have to learn from your mistakes even though these experiences hurt in the deepest of your heart. I believe that when you like someone but really like not just a physical attraction you are enable to see that person’s flaws or as people say love makes you blind. In my case or at least for me, love made me so blind, he was really handsome and am afraid that this is not what I mean about flaws, it has to do with, that I was not able to see what I was going to go through, and how it would in some way this defeat of my, change my life. Well it is really nice to fall in love with a person that loves you back, but when you fall for someone that in my case was what I call a player, you really can’t get lower than this trust me. When I met him he changed my world, he gave my life a 360 degrees. He was at first everything a girl wants well at least what I wanted, he was nice and in some way I felt secure. He was always there for me. I remember we talked by texts all day long, I also remember my mom would get so angry at me because my cell phone credit, expired in like two or maximum three days and I remember  she would threatened me with taking away my cell phone. I really hadn’t seen my dad with a certain attitude of jealousy until I told him that there was someone in my life, I mean you should have seen his face at that moment. My dad had a face of anger and sadness, all mixed up. I believe that my dad thought what every dad thinks when their little girl asks for permission of having a relationship; he was terrified that someone would take all of the love given to him  and divided it in two, my dad and my mom in one side and the person am with in a relationship in the other. Anyways ill go on with my defeat of love. He made me believe that I was the only thing that matter to him and gave me certain security that we were going to be in something serious. I believe that by now you have a clue of what am talking about, yes well am talking about my first love that happened three years ago. The story goes on, now I will tell you how my uncontrollable defeat came and how my heart was crushed in thousands of little pieces that took me a very long time to get them together. He started getting weird from time to time, and it would seem odd that he wouldn’t send me any texts in a day or didn’t answer mine. He changed completely and for me it seems like it was from night to day. I really couldn’t understand why he had changed that much towards me, I didn’t knew if I had done or said something wrong.  But then we just stopped talking, I believe it was by pride that we made this, I thought that if he didn’t talked to me I wouldn’t talked to him and I believe something similar happened with him. Then few days later I found out that I had just been his amusement in that couple of months. He really broke my heart in the worst way, even though what happened I don’t regret anything we passed through, because not every time was a bad time, there were happy moments as well. My only regret was to allow him the power of entering in my life and giving him the freedom of doing everything he wanted with me. This story is about the biggest defeat I have ever had, and now I remember those days I just to cry and now I just feel sad and sometimes I even laugh of myself, of how pathetic I really looked crying there all nights, but anyway this is left behind and my defeat story just reminds me every day of how vulnerable humans are when they are in love and specially of a player.  

Childhood Event

Well my story begins when I was nine years old, and I had to move to New York and go to a school there. At first I was very excited and thrilled to have new friends and to meet new teachers because believe or not I was more responsible at that age that am now. Anyway I didn’t really knew how to speak English at that time so everything I heard was people talking words I couldn’t understand and that made me feel a little frustrated but anyhow you can say I was happy to go to a new school. I remembered that my first day I got up, brushed my teeth, had breakfast made by my dad and let me add that I appreciate that my dad made me my breakfast every day but he can’t really cook that well and I had to eated everyday, but I never told him that because I knew he would feel bad so I sacrificed myself literary.  Well I was telling how my day started now am going to go on how at the end of the day I wanted to be dead. I arrived to the school and when I was standing in the door my stomach began to hurt so bad and no I didn’t wanted to go to the bathroom if you are thinking that, I was really nervous and no longer wanted to go in but I had to. When I stepped in, one teacher was waiting for me she already knew I would be arriving and that I didn’t knew how to speak English. She was Latin I believe because she was bilingual and with her I felt more secure but still nervous because I knew that all of my teachers were not going to be bilingual and that gave me a terrible fear. But anyway I went to my classroom and there were all of my classmates sitting down, and you know how awful it feels to have people starring at you until you have are seated, well I felt like a zoo animal. But then everybody in my class started approaching me and wanted to talk to me but because I didn’t knew how to speak English I couldn’t understand anything and neither could they so I felt bad because it really seemed that everybody in my class were nice. Suddenly a Mexican girl called Sabrina approached me and started talking to me in Spanish I was relieved I finally heard words in Spanish, well she was really nice and had a strong personality. Her skin tone was a little dark, and she had brown eyes and dark hair. At first I thought finally things are getting better, I was far from getting better.   This girl later became my worst nightmare and then little by little she gained the control of my life. She started by being sweet and almost anybody would talk to her, I found out why later on. She helped me study and helped me with some of my homework because I didn’t get anything, and she would also translate for me to the teachers. So we became friends but when recess time arrived she wanted me to stay with her all of the recess time and there were plenty of girls who wanted me to play with them but I couldn’t because she ordered me not to, or else she wouldn’t help me with my teachers and with school exercises so I had to in some way obey her. I felt really bad because of the way she treated me that I didn’t wanted to go to school and I cried every single day of how I felt so miserable for letting that girl treat me and do whatever she wanted with me just for the fact that I didn’t knew how to speak English. So one day I put myself to think that I really needed to learn English fast so that she could never say anything to me and because of that three months later I was speaking English and did well with my assignments and exercises and could talk with the rest of my friends. When she saw this she didn’t talk to me again and I was relieved that she didn’t, but I really have to thank her by being my inspiration for learning English and for out coming this face of my childhood.

first impressions

First impressions are not always the correct ones; we should all keep this in mind while meeting a person for the first time. We should never judge a person by how he or she looks like or like; most of the people say we should never judge a book by its cover. I believe people are not gold coins says my mother to me when I go tell her someone didn’t like me, and misjudge me. She always says to me that this is true wherever I go, it doesn’t matter the place am at or the people am with. I know my mother will never say something that could harm me in any way, so in the majority of the cases I trust in her experience and advices, but sometimes as a teenager I get out of the path. People are not gold coins, interesting say right; well I know now what my mother meant exactly when she told me that.  I didn’t really get it at first, I just thought ah my mother she’s just bodering me with her talks about how she has more experience than me and how her advices are hundred percent true. Well my story of how I managed to get to know a person whom I hated and she hated me, starts when I was just 12 years old. We got to keep in mind that when you’re that age you have a naïve mind, so going on with my story I was in 6^th grade, cursing elementary school at that time. I remember it was my first day at a new school and I was very nervous about the whole subject. I remember perfectly my stomach begin to hurt so bad that I didn’t knew what to do at that time. It’s just like when you get nervous and your hands begin shaking and they get all sweaty and your stomach begins to hurt and starts to make some weird noises and you turn to see the other way because you believe people is staring at you and there actually not there in their world thinking how they are going to spend the rest of the day, and you believed that  because it’s all a product of your imagination and all of the nerves you have at that particular time. Anyway that day I went to school without any makeup on, my sister told me not to because in her head it was a bad first impression  but what she does not know is that going without makeup was the really bad one actually. First of all I looked like I just got out of the hospital after days and well I had to bare with that for the rest of that day. I remember that the bell rang and my hands started shaking again and got all sweaty, and well it was actually time for me to go to my classroom where I would find my best and worst nightmare ever. First I compared it to a movie so full of fake terror that it even gave me nausea just to think about it but now I just laugh of all the things I just to think when I was that age. I went into the classroom at seven sharp I just didn’t wanted to get late in my first day of class. And I wasn’t late except for everybody else and the teacher, yeah strike one. Then everybody started to get in and for me the worst part was introducing me to everyone in the class and me stubborn a lot during the words the teacher made me give. Then during my words a girl just stood up to throw some garbage and gave a look like what a retard person she is. She was wearing the uniform of the school with a blue sweater that day and her shoes were filled with sparkly glitter and I remembered well that her beige pants were slightly brown in the bottom, because that day had been raining and the mod stained her pants as well as others.  First I felt really bad and then I got an anger that is indescribable; the type of anger when you know your boyfriend is cheating on you and you want to break all of his bones that type of anger. Then it came recess time I really didn’t make any friends at that time, and as soon as the bell rang everybody just disappear in a matter of seconds including the teacher. But suddenly the same girl I thought she looked at me in a bad way came back for me and invited me to join her and her group, big surprise I got that minute and then from that day on we became such good friends and the girl I misjudge and gave a first bad impression just saved me of spending the recess alone. Now we are still best friends and we still remember how our first impression was, and we laugh all the time about my attack of stubbornness in the middle of the class. Now we have five years of knowing each other and standing up for each other in every single time we get the chance, because she taught me that first impressions are not always the correct ones.